never have i ever...

never have i ever
ever ever
had a time in my life where i could not find a song to describe how i am feeling
i need my sister to come home and guide me to something
ya know?
that something that you can listen to 100 times and still feel like there are a few more listens before you are done for the day?
the something that you can scream to in the car
or cry to in your bed
or laugh to with your friends
just something
preferably a song
with inspiring words
and dramatic music
and reminds me that although things might be a bit confusing now they will turn around

kinda like when i was little and for reasons i cant remember and wont attempt to acknowledge i would end up crying in front of my family, usually in the car, and someone would do a terrible unjust to my sorrow and make me laugh. i would end up laughing and crying and feeling awful but somewhat better than when i was just crying.

i just need that something


for now i will deal with the massive amounts of cds lindsey lead me to under her bed
and use them for a temporary band aid

adiós

once again

once again i find myself wasting precious minutes doing unnecessary things ie: facebook, stumbleupon, youtube, bloggingshit,

anyting so that i dont have to face the fact that my first final(of three that are back to back) is in aprox. 16 hours and i have nothing done to be ready for any of them
here is my list of things i NEED to do be be even the littlest bit prepared:

1. write 31 more questions for wester civ ( it has taken me about an hour of serious labor to crank out the first three)
2. complete my entire pre calc review plus go over old "exit papers"
3. remember all the usless things i have learned in yoga about focus and the importance of centering ones self or some other bullshit like that that isnt helping me in the least bit at this moment.

please
pray
for
me

if thats your thing
if not
please
come
do
my
questions
i will do the rest


live long and prosper
signed
soon to fail

ill try one more

lindsey wrote another beautiful blog
so i should probs follow the tradish
and attempt one myself

although i should really be writing questions for my western civ class that starts in about 32 minutes ill negate my schooling obligations in order to fulfill my unspoken agreement to cfln.

today is crazy day
or something of the sort
everyone is outside walking around to all the booths with people smiling and giving out fee stuff in hopes that kids at jccc will decide to take some initiative in their lives... little do they know this tactic is truly just wasteful. the young adults you just gave free stickers to will soon lose them in the wind and those yummy cookies all the grubby hands reached for only to find out they were full of nuts are probably going end up in the trash or crunched on the lawn (unless someone wants mine)
although this fair is quite exciting and the band "karaoke" is playing (yes you are very right in guessing this band plays and invites whoever wants to sing to come up and sing...lame gimmick or brilliant marketing strategy you be the judge)it is almost unfair that they had to plan this shindig two weeks before finals...i have to go to class i can not just skip to watch some silly anime kids singging their little hearts out to livin on a prayer or even better 'Bohemian Rhapsody' (gaaaag)
sommer and i sat on the hill for a few acts giving people numbers as if we were the judges then it was time to stop all the tomfoolery and go to math
i almost would have rather watched more wanna be queen acts
almost
blah blah
im done
i reallly do need to do class shit
fmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmml